Oh No...Not Again

Hello to all (especially Liz) from Hershey. And apologies from me about the quality. I'm still figuring this out.

For Winston

hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia

Just Words

Sometimes it seems like we get lost in the busy world of words. Too much information taking too much time, making too much noise.

And then there are times when a few simple words can change how I'm feeling.

"I'm really glad I married you."

I'm feeling great.

Women vs. Men

I received this by email. Now I'm not a big fan of email. I rarely use it. It seems to me that most people just want to forward their junk to me. But I got a big kick out of this one, probably because it rings so true, so I'm sharing here today.

HOW TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY

IT'S NOT DIFFICULT TO MAKE A WOMAN HAPPY. A MAN ONLY NEEDS TO BE:
1. A friend
2. A companion
3. A lover
4. A brother
5. A father
6. A master
7. A chef
8. An electrician
9. A carpenter
10. A plumber
11. A mechanic
12. A pest exterminator
13. A psychiatrist
14. A sexologist
15. A healer
16. A good listener
17. An organizer
18. Very clean
19. Sympathetic
20. Athletic
21. Warm
22. Attentive
23. Gallant
24. Intelligent
25. Funny
26. Creative
27. Tender
28. Strong
29. Understanding
30. Tolerant
31. Prudent
32. Ambitious
33. Capable
34. Courageous
35. Determined
36. True
37. Dependable
38. Passionate
39. Compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:
40. Give her compliments regularly
41. Love shopping
42. Be honest
43. Be rich
44. Not stress her out
45. Not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:
46. Give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
47. Give her lots of time, especially time for herself
48. Give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS ALSO VERY IMPORTANT:
49. Never to forget birthdays, anniversaries, arrangements that she makes



HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY
1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

Not Your Grandma's Magazine

"Not your mother's, either." This, according to my 96-year-old grandma, is my magazine now. "I think it's changed. It's for you younger women," she said as she handed me the first copy of her new subscription to Redbook. When I asked her why, she replied, "It doesn't interest me. Maybe it will interest you." Then she promptly changed the subject.

Later that day I took a look at my magazine. I don't think I'd seen a copy of it since I was a girl. Boy, she wasn't kidding. Poor Grandma! I can only imagine her horror as she flipped through the pages. The articles included, and I'm not making this up:

• How to Have Soul-Satisfying Sex Tonight
• Make the Ultimate Sex Connection
• Sexier Sex - Can I Really Have Sex There?
• The Man Manual - Get the Most Out of Your Guy

Oh, yes -- there were also articles on food and children. But nope, it's not my grandma's Redbook (doesn't it sound more like 80's Cosmo?). If you're curious, yes, I read the articles. No, I didn't learn anything new, though I'm not sure what that means about me.

Grandma has now given me many unread volumes of the magazine. I suggested she cancel her subscription, but she won't do it. I think she's too embarrassed. Or maybe she really thinks I could learn something. In any case, it seems I'm destined to receive at least a few more editions of not-your-mama's Redbook.

If I learn anything new, I'll let you know....maybe.

Create

Some days I just hate it when I have to click on "Create" for this blog. Especially on days when I don't feel the least bit creative. Like today. And on days when I've tried repeatedly to join the ranks of other bloggers who can put things into their sidebars. Like today. And days when I had the best idea for a post, but then I sit to write and it all flies right out of this empty head o' mine. Like today. Argggghh.